Dear Elijah

Dedicated to my best friend Elijah Rosello, 1988 – 2012. Dear Elijah, Happy almost birthday. On January 22nd you would be turning 28 and we would no doubt be going out dancing to celebrate. Sometimes you’re in my dreams and

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Dear Elijah

Dedicated to my best friend Elijah Rosello, 1988 – 2012. Dear Elijah, Happy almost birthday. On January 22nd you would be turning 28 and we would no doubt be going out dancing to celebrate. Sometimes you’re in my dreams and

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My Sweet Cyrus

My Sweet Cyrus, I remember so well the day I brought you home for the first time. Traumatized at only 14 weeks, you would only calm if I kept you inside my coat. It was late October & we walked two

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My Sweet Cyrus

My Sweet Cyrus, I remember so well the day I brought you home for the first time. Traumatized at only 14 weeks, you would only calm if I kept you inside my coat. It was late October & we walked two

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Shevat (Aquarius)

shevat is the 11th month of the jewish calendar year. the teachers of the kabbalah, ask us this month, to focus on the pleasure and complexities of consumption, for both body and soul. shevat marks the new year for trees, an ancient

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Shevat (Aquarius)

shevat is the 11th month of the jewish calendar year. the teachers of the kabbalah, ask us this month, to focus on the pleasure and complexities of consumption, for both body and soul. shevat marks the new year for trees, an ancient

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Dear Wesley Jude

Dear Wesley Jude, You are napping in the next room. Fitfully. You have never been a good sleeper, and you have two teeth coming in, so things have gone from bad to worse. I am so tired right now I

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Dear Wesley Jude

Dear Wesley Jude, You are napping in the next room. Fitfully. You have never been a good sleeper, and you have two teeth coming in, so things have gone from bad to worse. I am so tired right now I

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Dear Future Husband

Dear Future Husband, Before you asked me to marry you, I started writing my vows: I am starting this prematurely. We are not even engaged, but in my heart I know someday I will be reading this to you and

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Dear Future Husband

Dear Future Husband, Before you asked me to marry you, I started writing my vows: I am starting this prematurely. We are not even engaged, but in my heart I know someday I will be reading this to you and

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my dearest rumi-bear

my dearest rumi-bear, sweeping generalizations told me i would fall for you the moment you were placed on my chest. it didn’t happen this way for me, i was kind of disappointed and surprised. i thought i would be beside

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my dearest rumi-bear

my dearest rumi-bear, sweeping generalizations told me i would fall for you the moment you were placed on my chest. it didn’t happen this way for me, i was kind of disappointed and surprised. i thought i would be beside

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Dear Wyoming Skies

When I go out at night, I’ve never seen such stars. The vastness of your skies and colored sunsets tell me that things are going to be alright. Never have I felt so connected to your magic and nourishment. The

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Dear Wyoming Skies

When I go out at night, I’ve never seen such stars. The vastness of your skies and colored sunsets tell me that things are going to be alright. Never have I felt so connected to your magic and nourishment. The

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Dear Mama,

Dear mama, I’m writing this letter to you dear friend so that you know… Bearing witness to birth is always an awe-some experience. A newborn has never crowned in my presence without inducing tears of joy and awe. A mother

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Dear Mama,

Dear mama, I’m writing this letter to you dear friend so that you know… Bearing witness to birth is always an awe-some experience. A newborn has never crowned in my presence without inducing tears of joy and awe. A mother

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HEY YOU… YES, YOU.

Hey You, We have evolved into something quite beautiful. It’s taken years… decades. There were times I wanted to scream. I did. You heard me. You saw me cry, but you were relentless and pushed me beyond my comfort zone.

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HEY YOU… YES, YOU.

Hey You, We have evolved into something quite beautiful. It’s taken years… decades. There were times I wanted to scream. I did. You heard me. You saw me cry, but you were relentless and pushed me beyond my comfort zone.

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Dear Canon de Guadalupe

Dear Canon de Guadalupe, I feel enraptured by the road that has brought me southward . The whole journey has been incredible. Your mountains have been pulsing through me with the rising sun ushering me towards you and softly integrating

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Dear Canon de Guadalupe

Dear Canon de Guadalupe, I feel enraptured by the road that has brought me southward . The whole journey has been incredible. Your mountains have been pulsing through me with the rising sun ushering me towards you and softly integrating

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London. Boston. Swakopmund. Miami.

Dear London, It’s easier for me to write letters to cities than it is for me to write them to people. I love both so hard, but it seems more acceptable to express that love to a place. An inanimate

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London. Boston. Swakopmund. Miami.

Dear London, It’s easier for me to write letters to cities than it is for me to write them to people. I love both so hard, but it seems more acceptable to express that love to a place. An inanimate

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Dear Journal

Dear Journal, It has been 30 years since our relationship started and I must say you have saved my life many times.  You have been like a therapist, a friend, confidant and inspiration to me.  I never thought when I

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Dear Journal

Dear Journal, It has been 30 years since our relationship started and I must say you have saved my life many times.  You have been like a therapist, a friend, confidant and inspiration to me.  I never thought when I

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Dear Women, Dear Sisters~

Dear Women, Dear Sisters~ My Letter to you is certainly a Love Letter that has been welling with the clear amber radiance of molasses in my heart and flowing through my body, through my dance, in my nature forever. My

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Dear Women, Dear Sisters~

Dear Women, Dear Sisters~ My Letter to you is certainly a Love Letter that has been welling with the clear amber radiance of molasses in my heart and flowing through my body, through my dance, in my nature forever. My

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Dear Urban Someone

Dear Urban Someone, Do you miss trees? You were in my dream last night. We were dancing in the ballroom.  You smiled at me as I approached and then told me you weren’t in the mood. Your mother was there

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Dear Urban Someone

Dear Urban Someone, Do you miss trees? You were in my dream last night. We were dancing in the ballroom.  You smiled at me as I approached and then told me you weren’t in the mood. Your mother was there

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To My Best Friend

To my best friend I hated you so often. You hurt me so much. Why did you make me wear this pale, translucent skin, so prone to bruising, so sickly looking, so useless at protecting me from the sun? Why

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To My Best Friend

To my best friend I hated you so often. You hurt me so much. Why did you make me wear this pale, translucent skin, so prone to bruising, so sickly looking, so useless at protecting me from the sun? Why

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Tevet (Capricorn)

hebrew tevet sign capricorn month 10 // symbols anger, emotional maturity Tevet, according to the Kabbalists, is the moon associated with the experience of anger.  Anger, neither positive or negative in itself, has the ability empower when harnessed with integrity or destroy and cause suffering when

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Tevet (Capricorn)

hebrew tevet sign capricorn month 10 // symbols anger, emotional maturity Tevet, according to the Kabbalists, is the moon associated with the experience of anger.  Anger, neither positive or negative in itself, has the ability empower when harnessed with integrity or destroy and cause suffering when

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Today

Today, I want to ask myself What is it, that makes me weak? It is a monotonous day round Or the fear I abound, The fear of being a loser- The fear of loosing friends- The fear of letting the

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Today

Today, I want to ask myself What is it, that makes me weak? It is a monotonous day round Or the fear I abound, The fear of being a loser- The fear of loosing friends- The fear of letting the

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Reading Music In Braille

The path to the end is overwrought with thorns communicating with you is like trying to read music in braille     have you ever found in her, the soil you were looking for from behind your smile, her counterattack

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Reading Music In Braille

The path to the end is overwrought with thorns communicating with you is like trying to read music in braille     have you ever found in her, the soil you were looking for from behind your smile, her counterattack

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Fracas

Cheeks turning pink      her blood is pulsating to boil.      she sways, moving away from him. What? Nothing. He can’t see straight      her face blurs into the background      uncomfortable, he laughs. Really? He

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Fracas

Cheeks turning pink      her blood is pulsating to boil.      she sways, moving away from him. What? Nothing. He can’t see straight      her face blurs into the background      uncomfortable, he laughs. Really? He

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When Anger Heals

I’ve carried anger and rage with me since I was a small girl. It all started when my parents began to fight endless hours, when my mom would pass out drunk, when my babysitter touched me in ways that confused

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When Anger Heals

I’ve carried anger and rage with me since I was a small girl. It all started when my parents began to fight endless hours, when my mom would pass out drunk, when my babysitter touched me in ways that confused

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Open Letter

“Abuse and neglect negate love. Care and affirmation, the opposite of abuse and humiliation, are the foundation of love. No one can rightfully claim to be loving when behaving abusively.” ― Bell Hooks, All About Love: New Visions I spent a lot

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Open Letter

“Abuse and neglect negate love. Care and affirmation, the opposite of abuse and humiliation, are the foundation of love. No one can rightfully claim to be loving when behaving abusively.” ― Bell Hooks, All About Love: New Visions I spent a lot

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Plastic and Anger

“I like to write in a neat room, although I am very disorganized. The order seems to give me space; my eyes and my soul crave space.” From Gabriel Mistral’s essay Como Escribo My room is a mess right now.

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Plastic and Anger

“I like to write in a neat room, although I am very disorganized. The order seems to give me space; my eyes and my soul crave space.” From Gabriel Mistral’s essay Como Escribo My room is a mess right now.

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Believe In Our Own Safety

Oh man, am I angry these days. World news, terrorism, politics, the treatment of animals, and all the stuff happening in my personal life – I’m outraged. But the outrage comes from a place of sadness, fear, insecurity. I don’t want to let recent

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Believe In Our Own Safety

Oh man, am I angry these days. World news, terrorism, politics, the treatment of animals, and all the stuff happening in my personal life – I’m outraged. But the outrage comes from a place of sadness, fear, insecurity. I don’t want to let recent

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Don’t Call Me Beautiful

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” Mark Twain Nothing calms me more than a cup of hot water, making everything better one sip

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Don’t Call Me Beautiful

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” Mark Twain Nothing calms me more than a cup of hot water, making everything better one sip

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Allowing Anger

Writing this with a lit candle before me focuses my will power, that unique spark.  To draw from the well of creative flow, the 3rd spinning wheel at the center of my being must be open.  As sweet as this

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Allowing Anger

Writing this with a lit candle before me focuses my will power, that unique spark.  To draw from the well of creative flow, the 3rd spinning wheel at the center of my being must be open.  As sweet as this

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Kislev (Sagittarius)

hebrew kislev sign sagittarius month 9 // symbols darkness, truth-seeker, illumination Kislev, the darkest month of the year, is associated by the Kabbalists with trust – nurturing our confidence when wandering the dark, that our hearts may illuminate a vision of what is to come. This month also contains

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Kislev (Sagittarius)

hebrew kislev sign sagittarius month 9 // symbols darkness, truth-seeker, illumination Kislev, the darkest month of the year, is associated by the Kabbalists with trust – nurturing our confidence when wandering the dark, that our hearts may illuminate a vision of what is to come. This month also contains

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Jocabed: My First Responsibility

“The moon looks wonderful in this warm evening light, just as a candle flame looks beautiful in the light of morning. Light within light…It seems to me to be a metaphor for the human soul, the singular light within that

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Jocabed: My First Responsibility

“The moon looks wonderful in this warm evening light, just as a candle flame looks beautiful in the light of morning. Light within light…It seems to me to be a metaphor for the human soul, the singular light within that

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Save My Soul

I didn’t start here, in this place where coyotes outnumber humans. Here, where my nearest neighbors are two retired ranch horses, a half-grown colt, and a pasture full of sheep. I grew up in a suburb of Detroit, with a

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Save My Soul

I didn’t start here, in this place where coyotes outnumber humans. Here, where my nearest neighbors are two retired ranch horses, a half-grown colt, and a pasture full of sheep. I grew up in a suburb of Detroit, with a

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Reality and Truth

The train hurtles through the foggy November afternoon toward the airport.  It’s barely five o’clock but darkness has already begun to settle over the city. The man next to me is on his second gin tonic light, his cheeks visibly flushed.

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Reality and Truth

The train hurtles through the foggy November afternoon toward the airport.  It’s barely five o’clock but darkness has already begun to settle over the city. The man next to me is on his second gin tonic light, his cheeks visibly flushed.

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Majestic Mountain

I was watching a documentary a few nights ago on the forming of the lands that currently make up the section of the continent named the United States of America. The land is constantly shifting, created from immense land masses

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Majestic Mountain

I was watching a documentary a few nights ago on the forming of the lands that currently make up the section of the continent named the United States of America. The land is constantly shifting, created from immense land masses

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Alabama I

We exist upon a multitude of layers–from the chief known as the black warrior and the ancient mound builders to the marchers, the protesters, and the everyday people intent on leaving lasting marks. They all drew their lines and ached

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Alabama I

We exist upon a multitude of layers–from the chief known as the black warrior and the ancient mound builders to the marchers, the protesters, and the everyday people intent on leaving lasting marks. They all drew their lines and ached

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Plane Truths

A few weeks ago I sat next to a woman on an airplane ride. Our conversation began around the time of beverage service & continued through our bumpy landing nearly 3 hours later. We talked as old friends would, speaking

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Plane Truths

A few weeks ago I sat next to a woman on an airplane ride. Our conversation began around the time of beverage service & continued through our bumpy landing nearly 3 hours later. We talked as old friends would, speaking

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My Mind Wonders

Autumn is here. My favorite season, yet a time of year when I feel most vulnerable. I love the vibrant colors, the comfortable temperatures—neither too hot nor too cold—and wearing boots, those heavy things that make me feel that much

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My Mind Wonders

Autumn is here. My favorite season, yet a time of year when I feel most vulnerable. I love the vibrant colors, the comfortable temperatures—neither too hot nor too cold—and wearing boots, those heavy things that make me feel that much

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An Outward Curl

I have always been a truth seeker. I thrive to be authentic and centered from the core of my being. At the moment truth strikes me like a cold wind that is sobering, refreshing, invigorating and sad that the season

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An Outward Curl

I have always been a truth seeker. I thrive to be authentic and centered from the core of my being. At the moment truth strikes me like a cold wind that is sobering, refreshing, invigorating and sad that the season

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Returning

After the long rush of summer, traveling here and there for work and play, the imminence of winter turns my compass home.  Sugar maples and old oak trees bow and drip offerings of gold, ochre, scarlet and brown.  Even the fir

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Returning

After the long rush of summer, traveling here and there for work and play, the imminence of winter turns my compass home.  Sugar maples and old oak trees bow and drip offerings of gold, ochre, scarlet and brown.  Even the fir

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Seeking Truth in the Mountains

All of the mountains moved and the hurdles jumped are behind me. I hear the hum of my tires on hwy 5 heading towards Whiskeytown, Lewiston and Weaverville at last. I had left under the cloak of night with my

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Seeking Truth in the Mountains

All of the mountains moved and the hurdles jumped are behind me. I hear the hum of my tires on hwy 5 heading towards Whiskeytown, Lewiston and Weaverville at last. I had left under the cloak of night with my

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Fire, Fear & Grounding

Fire I started to consider the word fiery the other day in my yoga teacher-training program. It’s used to describe specific asanas, chakras, mantras, mudras, etc. It didn’t previously feel like a legitimate adjective, sort of how I think of

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Fire, Fear & Grounding

Fire I started to consider the word fiery the other day in my yoga teacher-training program. It’s used to describe specific asanas, chakras, mantras, mudras, etc. It didn’t previously feel like a legitimate adjective, sort of how I think of

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Home

the folding table is tucked into a desperate corner of our pre-war kitchen. on it there are piles of unopened junk mail, hot-pink napkins from a dinner party last month, some crumbs of challah, and my heavy laptop weighing down

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Home

the folding table is tucked into a desperate corner of our pre-war kitchen. on it there are piles of unopened junk mail, hot-pink napkins from a dinner party last month, some crumbs of challah, and my heavy laptop weighing down

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Emptiness, A New Moon Meditation

Emptiness is this gift, this potion, the clearest sensation of an ocean of trust. Emptiness is this baseline softness beneath it all that calls us to our heights and higher. Emptiness is this journey, this wisdom, this fleeting memory of

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Emptiness, A New Moon Meditation

Emptiness is this gift, this potion, the clearest sensation of an ocean of trust. Emptiness is this baseline softness beneath it all that calls us to our heights and higher. Emptiness is this journey, this wisdom, this fleeting memory of

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Cheshvan (Scorpio)

hebrew cheshvan sign scorpio month 8 // symbols emptiness, death + redemption Cheshvan, a month void of holidays, is spoken of by the Kabbalists as a time of attention to death and redemption. This moon is also associated with the

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Cheshvan (Scorpio)

hebrew cheshvan sign scorpio month 8 // symbols emptiness, death + redemption Cheshvan, a month void of holidays, is spoken of by the Kabbalists as a time of attention to death and redemption. This moon is also associated with the

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Tishrei (Libra)

hebrew tishrei sign libra month 7 // symbols scales, temperance, self Tishrei brings the High Holy Days and the birth of a new season, and is therefore an opportune month to set intention – engaging with the primal question of who we are,

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Tishrei (Libra)

hebrew tishrei sign libra month 7 // symbols scales, temperance, self Tishrei brings the High Holy Days and the birth of a new season, and is therefore an opportune month to set intention – engaging with the primal question of who we are,

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Bleeding Heart

This month, for the first time in a very long time, I have struggled to connect with our theme of temperance. Not that I don’t crave balance, not that I don’t desperately want to steady myself. Just that it feels

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Bleeding Heart

This month, for the first time in a very long time, I have struggled to connect with our theme of temperance. Not that I don’t crave balance, not that I don’t desperately want to steady myself. Just that it feels

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A Place To Land

This post is dedicated to Francesca Dejosia. What’s the best way to manage grief and trauma? With the recent death of a friend’s mom, I’ve been thinking about this topic a lot. Life is full of difficult experiences and how

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A Place To Land

This post is dedicated to Francesca Dejosia. What’s the best way to manage grief and trauma? With the recent death of a friend’s mom, I’ve been thinking about this topic a lot. Life is full of difficult experiences and how

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Changing Seasons

I love the question of temperance and balance. It reminds me of equanimity and the capacity to feel peace inside all experience. Our theme for this month feels deeply alive at as the summer flowers turn to dead leaves falling,

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Changing Seasons

I love the question of temperance and balance. It reminds me of equanimity and the capacity to feel peace inside all experience. Our theme for this month feels deeply alive at as the summer flowers turn to dead leaves falling,

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The Woman That I Am

language can seem universal but it is truly particular in nature. the language i use to describe my story, while constructed by another, is meant to relay my unique experience. language is limited, culturally imprisoned. it is hard to tell

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The Woman That I Am

language can seem universal but it is truly particular in nature. the language i use to describe my story, while constructed by another, is meant to relay my unique experience. language is limited, culturally imprisoned. it is hard to tell

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Everything Balances Out

The nature of life is balance. Polarities of yin and yang, balancing each other, like hot and cold, full and empty, dark and light. No favoritism to the right or left. Each playing a part. Balance is a dynamic state,

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Everything Balances Out

The nature of life is balance. Polarities of yin and yang, balancing each other, like hot and cold, full and empty, dark and light. No favoritism to the right or left. Each playing a part. Balance is a dynamic state,

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Let The Body Settle

I seek equipoise inner child, innocent child eternal guardian of the path before she was taught to judge she witnessed. the scales of life didn’t exist beneath my anxiety there is anger below anger, fear working through each betrayal appearance

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Let The Body Settle

I seek equipoise inner child, innocent child eternal guardian of the path before she was taught to judge she witnessed. the scales of life didn’t exist beneath my anxiety there is anger below anger, fear working through each betrayal appearance

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Never Too Late.

The New Year has arrived and all that I did not accomplish that I set out to last year, in terms of my personal, professional and spiritual life, I can still do now. I’m a work in progress and acknowledging

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Never Too Late.

The New Year has arrived and all that I did not accomplish that I set out to last year, in terms of my personal, professional and spiritual life, I can still do now. I’m a work in progress and acknowledging

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Fire On Paugh Lake

My eyes soften to the barrage of jade green earth streaming past. The plentiful farms and fields near Ottawa, Canada are a unified front of tall corn stalks with their golden locks cast in the wind. Off into the backcountry

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Fire On Paugh Lake

My eyes soften to the barrage of jade green earth streaming past. The plentiful farms and fields near Ottawa, Canada are a unified front of tall corn stalks with their golden locks cast in the wind. Off into the backcountry

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New Moon, An Interview

Carrie: Hey, Jade. Jade: Hi Littlebit. Carrie: We have an amazing life, but I still seems to have bad anxiety. So last month I went to the doctor. They diagnosed me with PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder). It’s a severe type

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New Moon, An Interview

Carrie: Hey, Jade. Jade: Hi Littlebit. Carrie: We have an amazing life, but I still seems to have bad anxiety. So last month I went to the doctor. They diagnosed me with PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder). It’s a severe type

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Working Mom

This morning, as per our usual, my son and I walked my husband to the train. Today it felt different, the coolness beneath the humidity is lifting and fall is certainly coming. I feel grounding in my being. Fall is

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Working Mom

This morning, as per our usual, my son and I walked my husband to the train. Today it felt different, the coolness beneath the humidity is lifting and fall is certainly coming. I feel grounding in my being. Fall is

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Elul (Virgo)

hebrew elul sign virgo month 6 // symbols virgin, beloved, inner-dialogue Elul is a time of attentiveness and anticipation, preparing our minds and hearts for the upcoming season and new year. It is an auspicious moment to process our inner-dialogue, returning us to a voice that is

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Elul (Virgo)

hebrew elul sign virgo month 6 // symbols virgin, beloved, inner-dialogue Elul is a time of attentiveness and anticipation, preparing our minds and hearts for the upcoming season and new year. It is an auspicious moment to process our inner-dialogue, returning us to a voice that is

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Internal Voices of Elul

Sometimes the internal voices guiding me are reminiscent of A Christmas Carol- think Christmas past, Christmas present, and Christmas future, only without Christmas.  Here, in Elul, a time of contemplation, of heshbon ha-nefesh (accounting of the soul), I think of

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Internal Voices of Elul

Sometimes the internal voices guiding me are reminiscent of A Christmas Carol- think Christmas past, Christmas present, and Christmas future, only without Christmas.  Here, in Elul, a time of contemplation, of heshbon ha-nefesh (accounting of the soul), I think of

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Love, This Will Be Excruciating

My August 2015 Self Writes a Letter to My February 2011 Self Love, do you remember that day you sat with Mom — maybe two weeks before she died—and she sat on the edge of her bed, crying?  How she

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Love, This Will Be Excruciating

My August 2015 Self Writes a Letter to My February 2011 Self Love, do you remember that day you sat with Mom — maybe two weeks before she died—and she sat on the edge of her bed, crying?  How she

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Talk To Me

This past year I avoided being alone with myself. I don’t mean that I was constantly in the company of other people; rather, I didn’t want to be alone with my own thoughts. I found that the best way to

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Talk To Me

This past year I avoided being alone with myself. I don’t mean that I was constantly in the company of other people; rather, I didn’t want to be alone with my own thoughts. I found that the best way to

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From Flesh to Ash

This month of Elul I walk in the Spirit realms and visit the graves of my beloveds. Under this New Moon and on my guard I have witnessed children, lovers, mothers, daughters, sons and strangers pass from flesh to ashes,

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From Flesh to Ash

This month of Elul I walk in the Spirit realms and visit the graves of my beloveds. Under this New Moon and on my guard I have witnessed children, lovers, mothers, daughters, sons and strangers pass from flesh to ashes,

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Integrated Dialogue

Often my inner dialogue has felt like a battle between conflicting, and seemingly contradictory parts, making it almost certain that one side will lose. In recent months, perhaps because of a deeper alignment taking place within, I’m noticing my inner dialogue

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Integrated Dialogue

Often my inner dialogue has felt like a battle between conflicting, and seemingly contradictory parts, making it almost certain that one side will lose. In recent months, perhaps because of a deeper alignment taking place within, I’m noticing my inner dialogue

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Alone Time

Elul is dedicated to ‘private reflection and inner dialogue'; since I became a mom over a year ago I’ve had little time for either.  I spend most of my days and nights with, and focused on, my son Noah.  Being Noah’s

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Alone Time

Elul is dedicated to ‘private reflection and inner dialogue'; since I became a mom over a year ago I’ve had little time for either.  I spend most of my days and nights with, and focused on, my son Noah.  Being Noah’s

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The Garden’s Wisdom

This year my garden is once again proving to be an endless source of wisdom as I continue to learn how to reconcile my natural predilection towards control with the uncontrollable forces of nature that play out in the tiny

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The Garden’s Wisdom

This year my garden is once again proving to be an endless source of wisdom as I continue to learn how to reconcile my natural predilection towards control with the uncontrollable forces of nature that play out in the tiny

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Good Enough

I was going to write zivar with the five minutes I have reserved for personal time today to say that I wouldn’t be able to hand in a post this month or worse, that I wouldn’t be able to contribute

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Good Enough

I was going to write zivar with the five minutes I have reserved for personal time today to say that I wouldn’t be able to hand in a post this month or worse, that I wouldn’t be able to contribute

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Happy

It unsettling how little I know about myself. What makes me sad, fearful, and lonely is clear but I’m unsure of what makes me happy. Or maybe I do know but I don’t see those things as worthy. Here’s a

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Happy

It unsettling how little I know about myself. What makes me sad, fearful, and lonely is clear but I’m unsure of what makes me happy. Or maybe I do know but I don’t see those things as worthy. Here’s a

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Inside Out.

10:30pm goodnight, honey. thank you for everything. for today, for this gorgeous getaway, for this birthday week. for dinner, that salad was perfect. // of course, lover. push that pillow below your back just a bit snugger? // yes. i

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Inside Out.

10:30pm goodnight, honey. thank you for everything. for today, for this gorgeous getaway, for this birthday week. for dinner, that salad was perfect. // of course, lover. push that pillow below your back just a bit snugger? // yes. i

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In Challah, Life Lessons

There’s something about baking. It gives you the chance to reflect and practice patience. It’s a metaphor for life – overwork the dough and it will get tough, ignore it and it will return heaviness. Give it the right touch

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In Challah, Life Lessons

There’s something about baking. It gives you the chance to reflect and practice patience. It’s a metaphor for life – overwork the dough and it will get tough, ignore it and it will return heaviness. Give it the right touch

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Av (Leo)

Av is the fifth month of the Jewish calendar year. According to the Kabbalistic Book of Formation this moon is dedicated to enhancing one’s hearing, in its capacity to be a vehicle for understanding. Traditionally, the month of Av is divided into

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Av (Leo)

Av is the fifth month of the Jewish calendar year. According to the Kabbalistic Book of Formation this moon is dedicated to enhancing one’s hearing, in its capacity to be a vehicle for understanding. Traditionally, the month of Av is divided into

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Internal River

While pausing one of my life lines and slowing down that path another line burst forth into a full gallop. By slowing down and diverting one internal river I have allowed the tributaries to flow into a stream that is

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Internal River

While pausing one of my life lines and slowing down that path another line burst forth into a full gallop. By slowing down and diverting one internal river I have allowed the tributaries to flow into a stream that is

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The Fuel Of Regret

While many of the women of our project will take a hiatus for the months of Tamuz and Av, a few contributors agreed to remain and share words on this very theme of ‘pausing for self-care’. It wasn’t going to be

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The Fuel Of Regret

While many of the women of our project will take a hiatus for the months of Tamuz and Av, a few contributors agreed to remain and share words on this very theme of ‘pausing for self-care’. It wasn’t going to be

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Pause

While many of the women of our project will take a hiatus for the months of Tamuz and Av, a few contributors agreed to remain and share words on this very theme of ‘pausing for self-care’. .. I’ve been learning more

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Pause

While many of the women of our project will take a hiatus for the months of Tamuz and Av, a few contributors agreed to remain and share words on this very theme of ‘pausing for self-care’. .. I’ve been learning more

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Trust

I am not sure how long it took me to trust again. I know after that night I did not want anyone to touch me for a very long time. I know I took a hiatus from my normal long-term

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Trust

I am not sure how long it took me to trust again. I know after that night I did not want anyone to touch me for a very long time. I know I took a hiatus from my normal long-term

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Initiation

Since the release of my debut album, Legacy, and the party to celebrate it’s completion, I have been feeling an extended out breath of relief. All of my efforts settle; I give myself permission to take a moment and care for

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Initiation

Since the release of my debut album, Legacy, and the party to celebrate it’s completion, I have been feeling an extended out breath of relief. All of my efforts settle; I give myself permission to take a moment and care for

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Tamuz (Cancer)

tamuz is the fourth month of the jewish calendar year. according to the kabbalistic book of formation this moon is dedicated to enhancing one’s vision, the ability to see beyond physical perception toward what is true. tamuz also begins the summer season which

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Tamuz (Cancer)

tamuz is the fourth month of the jewish calendar year. according to the kabbalistic book of formation this moon is dedicated to enhancing one’s vision, the ability to see beyond physical perception toward what is true. tamuz also begins the summer season which

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Nobodies Baby But Mine

I have this idea in my head that the law of conservation of energy and love are related. I like to think that love cannot be destroyed, like energy, but that it just changes. I believe in love. Love moves

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Nobodies Baby But Mine

I have this idea in my head that the law of conservation of energy and love are related. I like to think that love cannot be destroyed, like energy, but that it just changes. I believe in love. Love moves

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To Bow Willingly

Rumi’s poem, “Willingly or Unwillingly” has been in my thoughts: The faithful bow willingly, intending the pleasure of God. The unbeliever worships God, but unwillingly,  intending some other desire. Yes, he keeps the King’s fortress in good repair, but claims

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To Bow Willingly

Rumi’s poem, “Willingly or Unwillingly” has been in my thoughts: The faithful bow willingly, intending the pleasure of God. The unbeliever worships God, but unwillingly,  intending some other desire. Yes, he keeps the King’s fortress in good repair, but claims

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The Presence of Two

i have been devoted to building community structure for as long as i can remember. maybe the ‘good girl’ in me believed this would help me accumulate prestige and popularity, most probably it is because i crave connection, an opportunity

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The Presence of Two

i have been devoted to building community structure for as long as i can remember. maybe the ‘good girl’ in me believed this would help me accumulate prestige and popularity, most probably it is because i crave connection, an opportunity

/ One Comment

Sivan (Gemini)

sivan is the third month of the jewish calendar year, and its moon bares the symbol of gemini or twins. the kabbalah understands these twins as a lover and beloved, a pair whose profound connection traverses the space between opposite and

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Sivan (Gemini)

sivan is the third month of the jewish calendar year, and its moon bares the symbol of gemini or twins. the kabbalah understands these twins as a lover and beloved, a pair whose profound connection traverses the space between opposite and

/ 2 Comments

Emergence

Happiness abounds… I can feel it emerging like the blooming flowers on my rooftop garden. I realize now as I emerge from a deep catatonic state and catch myself dwelling in fear that I can just as easily shift my

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Emergence

Happiness abounds… I can feel it emerging like the blooming flowers on my rooftop garden. I realize now as I emerge from a deep catatonic state and catch myself dwelling in fear that I can just as easily shift my

/ One Comment

Little Stone

I’ve been offered a full time job at a top advertising agency. It means more money and responsibility, a better title, and possibly the thing I’ve been looking for: a career. The problem is that I thought I left advertising

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Little Stone

I’ve been offered a full time job at a top advertising agency. It means more money and responsibility, a better title, and possibly the thing I’ve been looking for: a career. The problem is that I thought I left advertising

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Polarities

when i reach down there is height when i trust there is vision when i know where i stand and i learn how to listen, i find peace and clarity and sunshine in my stability. there in the dark, there

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Polarities

when i reach down there is height when i trust there is vision when i know where i stand and i learn how to listen, i find peace and clarity and sunshine in my stability. there in the dark, there

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Middle Woman’s Paradox

While I am stretching and extending my arms and consciousness I am also thrashed and pummeled in echo chambers of small mind and small self, of judgment and sense of separation. How can I face this expanse of paradox? As

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Middle Woman’s Paradox

While I am stretching and extending my arms and consciousness I am also thrashed and pummeled in echo chambers of small mind and small self, of judgment and sense of separation. How can I face this expanse of paradox? As

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Unbound

Why is it so uncomfortable to sit in the “both, and”? I want everything to fall into perfect, neat, and predictable. Controllable categories. No contradictions. No compromises. No cliff hangers and in betweens. Black and white. Either, Or, Please. I

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Unbound

Why is it so uncomfortable to sit in the “both, and”? I want everything to fall into perfect, neat, and predictable. Controllable categories. No contradictions. No compromises. No cliff hangers and in betweens. Black and white. Either, Or, Please. I

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Unfamiliar Territory

It was feeding day and the rattlesnakes were hungry. The caretaker released two tiny white mice into the terrarium and within seconds, the first snake had lurched forward and sunk its glistening teeth into the innocent creature. I watched the

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Unfamiliar Territory

It was feeding day and the rattlesnakes were hungry. The caretaker released two tiny white mice into the terrarium and within seconds, the first snake had lurched forward and sunk its glistening teeth into the innocent creature. I watched the

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Face To Face

Today a fresh start in a place I call “home”, who knows tomorrow. It’s Spring and I’m sitting here in my still somewhat empty living room, listening to the birds singing their early morning melody, interrupted only by the sound

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Face To Face

Today a fresh start in a place I call “home”, who knows tomorrow. It’s Spring and I’m sitting here in my still somewhat empty living room, listening to the birds singing their early morning melody, interrupted only by the sound

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Family Vacation

somewhere between unpacking my bags and meeting for our second breakfast, i start to lose my shit. i am irritable, easily triggered, lost in childhood stories of not being seen or maybe not having enough space. our house was small,

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Family Vacation

somewhere between unpacking my bags and meeting for our second breakfast, i start to lose my shit. i am irritable, easily triggered, lost in childhood stories of not being seen or maybe not having enough space. our house was small,

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Iyar (Taurus)

Iyar is the second month of the Jewish calendar year. According to the Kabbalistic Book of Formation this moon offers an auspicious time for the refinement and healing of self and soul. Iyar is a bridge between the festivals of Passover,

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Iyar (Taurus)

Iyar is the second month of the Jewish calendar year. According to the Kabbalistic Book of Formation this moon offers an auspicious time for the refinement and healing of self and soul. Iyar is a bridge between the festivals of Passover,

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Micro Shifts

The month of Iyar marks one year since my son Noah was born.  It makes sense to me that he is a Taurus — an earth sign — because being his mom has brought more earthiness into my life. I

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Micro Shifts

The month of Iyar marks one year since my son Noah was born.  It makes sense to me that he is a Taurus — an earth sign — because being his mom has brought more earthiness into my life. I

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Time-Out

I believe the great refiner is relationship. Whether it is our relationship with a spouse, a child, a parent, a friend, a boss, a client, a student, our bodies or spirit, these are the things that call us to refinement.

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Time-Out

I believe the great refiner is relationship. Whether it is our relationship with a spouse, a child, a parent, a friend, a boss, a client, a student, our bodies or spirit, these are the things that call us to refinement.

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Satisfaction Guaranteed

While I’ve done short spring cleanses lasting a few days to a week, this was a tall order. As my 33rd birthday gift to myself, I embarked on a 21 day clean-eating protocol based on the work of Dr. Alejandro

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Satisfaction Guaranteed

While I’ve done short spring cleanses lasting a few days to a week, this was a tall order. As my 33rd birthday gift to myself, I embarked on a 21 day clean-eating protocol based on the work of Dr. Alejandro

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Standing The Test of Time

How to heal and grow my inner-confidence has been a lifelong struggle. For many years, my confidence has been buried in a traumatic fear from my childhood — seeking to stay ahead, so far as not to be shattered by family

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Standing The Test of Time

How to heal and grow my inner-confidence has been a lifelong struggle. For many years, my confidence has been buried in a traumatic fear from my childhood — seeking to stay ahead, so far as not to be shattered by family

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Potent Medicine

Seeking the higher ground I opportunistically reach my hands toward the light saber of illumination and ask for healing. The fruit is ripe on the tree and I want to choose what I take with care and attention. I question: what will

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Potent Medicine

Seeking the higher ground I opportunistically reach my hands toward the light saber of illumination and ask for healing. The fruit is ripe on the tree and I want to choose what I take with care and attention. I question: what will

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To Be A (Better) Writer

I start school this fall, a Masters Program for Creative writing. It’s going to be a challenge.  I’ll have to focus again the way I did last time I was in school, four years ago. Academia requires sincere improvement; there’s

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To Be A (Better) Writer

I start school this fall, a Masters Program for Creative writing. It’s going to be a challenge.  I’ll have to focus again the way I did last time I was in school, four years ago. Academia requires sincere improvement; there’s

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Lupa Is Dead

At the end of this last year my friend Lupa died. We were friends for many years and when she died I was devastated, but now, I am happy she is gone. That may sound cold, but she did not

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Lupa Is Dead

At the end of this last year my friend Lupa died. We were friends for many years and when she died I was devastated, but now, I am happy she is gone. That may sound cold, but she did not

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A Kinder Place

It was Tuesday. The late afternoon sun was shining outside but in my living room it was quiet and peaceful. Suddenly I heard a strange sound right outside the window. It sounded like a muffled scream. I looked up from

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A Kinder Place

It was Tuesday. The late afternoon sun was shining outside but in my living room it was quiet and peaceful. Suddenly I heard a strange sound right outside the window. It sounded like a muffled scream. I looked up from

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A Lesson In Excavation

The other day I met with the poet Marie Howe to show her some of my writing. She told me to point to the place in my poem I thought most important, where there was something at stake. I hesitantly

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A Lesson In Excavation

The other day I met with the poet Marie Howe to show her some of my writing. She told me to point to the place in my poem I thought most important, where there was something at stake. I hesitantly

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Tender Peace

First I learn what is true. Then I learn to tell the truth. At some point (hopefully) I learn to tell the truth honestly, without seeking validation or confirmation. He asked a difficult question and then laid in my arms

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Tender Peace

First I learn what is true. Then I learn to tell the truth. At some point (hopefully) I learn to tell the truth honestly, without seeking validation or confirmation. He asked a difficult question and then laid in my arms

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Going With The Flow

After months of tending to my family and enduring what felt like a long winter, I am delighted that spring is finally here. To celebrate spring, I am going to start by taking stock of my goals and refine what

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Going With The Flow

After months of tending to my family and enduring what felt like a long winter, I am delighted that spring is finally here. To celebrate spring, I am going to start by taking stock of my goals and refine what

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Refinement Through Storytelling

This month has been all about refinement and I feel a deep relief to arrive here and share what is in my heart. I can’t help but muse about how my personal story is so similar to what happened historically to

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Refinement Through Storytelling

This month has been all about refinement and I feel a deep relief to arrive here and share what is in my heart. I can’t help but muse about how my personal story is so similar to what happened historically to

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Nisan (Aries)

nisan is the first month of the jewish calendar year. according to the kabalistic book of formation, this month belongs to the beginner who seeks authenticity by freeing herself from the bonds of expectation and fear of failure. on the

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Nisan (Aries)

nisan is the first month of the jewish calendar year. according to the kabalistic book of formation, this month belongs to the beginner who seeks authenticity by freeing herself from the bonds of expectation and fear of failure. on the

/ One Comment

Complicated Sorrows

Winter Solstice 2014 I was out walking today, considering your invitation to share how Mom’s death affected my heart.  So few people ask such questions. Snow fell cold against my face and breath filled my chest.  It reached all the

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Complicated Sorrows

Winter Solstice 2014 I was out walking today, considering your invitation to share how Mom’s death affected my heart.  So few people ask such questions. Snow fell cold against my face and breath filled my chest.  It reached all the

/ 2 Comments

Perfect Peach

I’ve just become a crone! Funny to realize I’ve reached this milestone. I can still see myself at 4 years old lusting in front of a perfect summer peach. Waiting for the courage that would eventually arrive and receiving the

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Perfect Peach

I’ve just become a crone! Funny to realize I’ve reached this milestone. I can still see myself at 4 years old lusting in front of a perfect summer peach. Waiting for the courage that would eventually arrive and receiving the

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